BirthMom Buds

I imagine that most of the people who read this blog (if, indeed, there’s anyone out there at all) are adoptive parents and prospective adoptive parents. Most adoption information really does seem to be aimed at us. For all the talk of the adoption “triad” of adoptive parents, adoptees, and birth parents, adoptive parents drive the conversations.

In the last few years, more and more birth parents have been blogging about their experiences. When I was pursuing adoption the first time around, I found the group BirthMom Buds. I quote:

BirthMom Buds is an organization and website that provides peer counseling, support, encouragement, and friendship to pregnant women considering adoption as well as women who have already placed children for adoption.

Since 2009, BirthMom Buds has had a blog. In the last month or so, they’ve introduced several new bloggers, each with compelling stories. I subscribe to their blog. Yes, I, an adoptive mother, subscribe to a blog written by, and for, birth mothers.

Why?

Adoptive parents need to remember that there are others who are touched by adoption. Sometimes, these people haven’t been touched so much as tackled. We focus a lot on what we can do as parents, how to obtain our children, how to make sure we don’t screw them up, how we feel about adoption, and how to make sure our children feel that adoption is positive.

We can learn so much from the members of the other parts of the triad. BirthMom Buds is a great way to expose yourself to opinions and experiences that aren’t all about us.

I should also note that I never comment on the blog posts. BirthMom Buds is for birthmothers, first and foremost. Adoptive parents cannot hijack the conversation. I believe we should be like the auditors in a college class. Here to observe and learn, but never to judge or take off on a tangent.

Photo Credit: BirthMom Buds

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