Her Grief is our Joy

December 8th, 2013

baby bed As I sit across from her, my husband by my side, I am overwhelmed with grief.  She is holding my baby girl that she gave birth to. We are all in tears, even the social worker.  Today is suppose to be one of the happiest days of my life, but all I feel is sadness.  Today is placement day. We will be taking our baby girl home today.  I have thought about this day for a long time. I have thought of the emotions I would feel at this moment, but I honestly never thought I would feel complete grief. The grief is not mine, it is hers. She is placing her baby for adoption.  She is trusting us to be… [more]

Top Ten Questions Part 2

November 17th, 2013

flower for blogThis is the second part to the Top 10 Questions I receive about adoption. Please remember I am not a professional.  These responses are from my own experience with adoption and research that I have completed over the years.  If you disagree with my answers please let me know.  I am always open to finding out more information and listening to other points of view. #6 Does the birth family know your phone number, last name, or address?  When we first started the process of adoption, this was a big concern for me.  I was so worried the birth parents would call us all the time or drop by our house whenever they wanted.  We learned quickly that was not… [more]

Top Ten Questions Part 1

October 28th, 2013
Categories: Adoption ABCs, FAQs

I thought it might be helpful if I compiled a list of the top ten questions I get asked about adoption.  The answers to these questions may differ from your opinion or vary from state to state.  There may be some answers that you don't agree with and that is okay.  If you do disagree, please leave a comment.  I would love and appreciate your opinions.  I highly recommend you perform your own research on the web and through any agency you come in contact with.  Don't be afraid to ask any questions you may have. #1.  The most asked question I get is, "How much does adoption cost?"  Every time some one asks me this, they start with, "Do you mind..."  I always laugh and say of course not.  When I… [more]

Get Ready for the Questions People Ask: Question #1

September 12th, 2013
Categories: Personal Stories

baby 1If you're adopting a child, you should practice your answers to questions that people will ask.  Questions that people blurt out that I never thought about before I adopted.  Or maybe that I thought would be asked but more subtly or, at least, would not be asked in front of my child. Questions #1:  When did you get her? There's got to be a better way to phrase that but that's how people say it.  What they really mean is how old was she when she was placed for adoption?  It took me a while to realize that because my daughter is biracial and I'm white, people assume that she was adopted through the foster system or internationally.  I can't only guess… [more]

Expect the Unexpected

September 5th, 2013

babyWhen we found out that our son had been born he was already 2 days old. He was born on a Thursday and they called us on Saturday.  His birth mom called the agency early in her pregnancy but never came in to fill out paperwork. The agency didn't hear from her again until she delivered our son. I remember the day we got the call like it was yesterday.    They told us a baby boy had been born and the birth mom wants to place the  baby for adoption.  She had placed another baby a couple of years earlier with the same agency so the social worker was familiar with her.  They continued to tell us that he does have… [more]

Delivery Room

August 25th, 2013

deliveryBefore we started the adoption process with my daughter, we prayed for the perfect birth mother for our family.  We wanted a birth mom that loved us and knew that we loved her.  We also wanted a birth mom that was open to letting us go to doctor appointments and be in the delivery room.  I knew that it was highly unlikely that we would be able to meet a birth mom that wanted all of those things too, but we still prayed.  I have heard wonderful stories about being in the delivery room and I have heard horror stories too. My biggest fear was that the birth mother would change her mind about adoption after she gave birth.  This does happen… [more]

Support Groups

August 18th, 2013

birthmomsThe way that we found out about the adoptive agency with our son was through a friend.  My husband worked with a guy that just adopted their son.  We planned a dinner date so that we could get to know them better and receive more information about adoption.  It was so nice knowing someone that had just adopted.  We could talk to them about our concerns and ask questions we were not comfortable asking our social worker.  We ended up becoming really good friends with this couple.   When we started the adoption process they helped us with completing all the paperwork, create our family profile book, but most importantly, they were there for emotional support.  To be able to pick up the… [more]

Where To Start

August 3rd, 2013

question markYou may have read many articles on how to choose an agency, but I thought I would add our experience.  We adopted from two different agencies.  The first agency was recommended by a friend.  The second agency we found using the internet, word of mouth, and doing a lot of research.  You will be working side by side with these agencies for awhile, so I think it is important to spend a lot of time finding the right one.  Choosing an agency is very overwhelming, so here is a check list that may help you along the way. 1.  One of the first questions I ask the agency is how do they plan to take care of the birth mother?  Do they… [more]

Are you Done Trying?

July 24th, 2013
Categories: Deciding to Adopt

frownDoes anyone ever ask you, “So are you done trying?” I can’t tell you how many times I have been asked that question. My first response is well, no! In order to keep the conversation light and uncomplicated, I would say, “Yes we are.” Trying just had a new meaning for me. It no longer meant, to get pregnant. I was still trying to have a baby, just a different way. When you are desperately trying to get pregnant, I believe you start becoming more insightful and looking at things from a different perspective. After the doctor had told us the chances of us getting pregnant on our own was very slim, I felt defeated. I felt… [more]

Hi, I am New Here.

June 30th, 2013
Categories: Personal Stories

mothersd day pic1 Hi, I am new to this blogging community. I am so happy to be here. Hopefully our story can bring encouragement and hope to you. My husband and I have been married for 10 wonderful years. We have two children, a son that is 4 and our daughter is 9 months. The beautiful and friendly state of Texas is our home. When my son turned one, I decided to quit my job as a teacher and stay home. Let me just tell you, staying home raising kids and keeping up with our house is far more difficult than being in a room with 20 first graders. It is a lot more rewarding though, and I wouldn't… [more]